I wrote this poem over twenty years ago, and it's as if I opened my heart up and tipped all the words out. I don't exactly know what was going on in my life at the time of writing it, but the narrative speaks volumes.
Eighteen months ago my life went on an unexpected turn, where I suddenly discovered I could paint. (If you want to know more, read my very first blog.) My very first picture was of me in what looks like a prison cell and I have chains on my wrists and and ankles. I have in fact used the 'said' painting above. Look where the block marked fear is chained to. These poems I'm sharing have been put away for a few years and I only noticed when I wrote the poems up onto my computer just over a week ago. Coincidence? I don't think so, but I'll let you decide...
Fear is like a big black cloud,
which hovers just above my head.
Thunderous rage churns deep inside.
Lightening forming to strike me dead.
Fear is like a ball and chain,
Restricting me from moving on.
Wrapped so tight around my leg,
I’m always struggling to get along.
Fear is like a big black knot,
That has formed itself around my heart.
Pulled so tight to near strangulation.
I’m scared that it will fall apart.
So, what can turn my grey sky blue?
How can I be freed?
What can help extinguish my heartache,
And pull out this deadly seed?
Strength lays dormant beneath my anguish.
Waiting there ready to fight.
Eager to strike through my darkness,
To make my days again be bright.
A reason for living, a reason for loving,
Is the key to conjure up my power.
To blast my fear into little pieces,
And for me to have my finest hour.
So out with the bad and in with the good,
I’ve learnt to let go of my pain.
A new day is on the horizon.
The sunlight is dawning to dry up my rain.